Last night, the world was privy to the incunabulum of what is bound to be the storied career of one Timothy Richard Tebow. Those that watched the game got to see the youngster complete 8 of his 13 passes for 105 yard and tack on a rushing touchdown. But, through his highlishts, he still reverted back to his low, long and loopy throwing motion.
This proves one major thing. Although he circumcises Philippino children in the off-season, can leap tall lineman in a single bound, and can doesn’t do pushups, he pushed the ground down, he is still, and always will be a man.
That means he struggles with everyday things just like we do. And, when the proverbial poop hits the ceiling fan, we will revert back to what is innate in us.
Let me lay out some of the things that men will always struggle with.
Huh?
Landis.
Yes?
How many homeruns does Barry Bonds have?
762.
Landis.
Yes?
What are you most afraid of in life?
Huh?
When a man is confronted with a question that he cannot readily answer, he is always going to throw a filler at you to buy some time. This filler will most often be “huh?”
“Huh?” does not mean that a man is lying to you, nor does it mean that he is trying to think of a lie to tell you. It just means that he is not fully ready to answer this question at the present moment.
He COULD be trying to think of a lie, but don’t assume, because we all know what assuming does, right? Yup. It makes an ass out off you and makes me wish I had lied to you for not trusting me.
Break your neck.
No matter how deeply in love a man is, no matter how long he’s only felt the extravagance of one vagina, no matter how homosexual he is, a man is going to break his neck over a beautiful woman.
I could be walking hand-in-hand with Mariah Carey to Kay jewelers to pick out her wedding ring that I can’t afford, and if Seema Sadekar crosses my path, my neck will whip to the side just as fast as it would if I were watching her ball come off the tee.
Ladies, if you catch your man breaking his neck at another woman, don’t try to call him on it, because he will only answer with “Huh?” Just be happy that your man can still spot a good looking woman, because that probably means he has one on his arm.
Not call
You people like this Usher character, right? He and Ludacris told you that “U Don’t Have to Call.” It’s okaaay giiiiirl. We gon’ be alright, tonight.
Can you chicas afford us the same liberties?
We don’t always think about checking in with the boss about where we’re going. Sometimes, it’s because we don’t want to deal with the unnecessary hassle that is inevitable, sometimes we just plum forget, and other times we have no real reason. Forrest Gump told us that sh!t happens sometimes. “And that’s all… I have to say… about that.”
Men, what are some other things that we will always do, that aren’t meant to drudge up controversy?
Ladies, what are some things that men will always do that you wish they would stop?
Lay them out in the comments section. Let’s see if we can’t help gender relations one post at a time.
Have Fun.
